Choice
by treze
Summary: Ragnarok manwah (?) LokiFenris. Read and review. All flames accepted.


Disclaimer: I do NOT own anything.

Note: Yes, I am alive but as much as I hate to admit it, Thou Shalt Not Fall For Thy Own Sister and Ame no Kioku are still on hold. I am so sorry to break my promise of not finishing the former on March but I will try to do so this April. (Stupid schoolwork!) Oh, and about this fic… don't ask. I have no idea where this came from. I know, I know, it sucks, that's why I posted it…

The story goes like:

Choice

hajime

She was not blind. Or so he tells himself.

Indeed, Fenris Fenrir was never blind. In fact, her vision was so perfect that she could see the different emotions between Chaos and Iris. No, Fenris was not blind.

She was simply numb to everything else that did not concern her feelings. Numb to the fact that Loki had always been her comfort.

The assassin stared up to the night sky, thinking, searching for answers as to why a certain warlock would always go stargazing whenever she had a chance.

But he couldn't see anything.

Perhaps it was he who was blind. Perhaps it was his fault that his affections were never returned. Perhaps it was him who was to blame that he did not know how to show that he cared.

Hmm…

"Loki? Are you in?" A familiar voice called out.

"Yes?"

Without answering, a female entered the room. For a moment, she stopped and admired what seemed to be the most beautiful would-be painting on canvas: Loki was there: half-naked, his chin propped up in a palm as his arms rested against the horizontal panel of the window.

Loki, the Loki, was stargazing.

"Are you busy tonight?" She asked, scooting closer to the only man in the room.

"No." Tearing his eyes away from what he'd been staring at for a couple of hours, he looked quietly at Fenris' orbs.

"Loki, I…"

"You heard them from the insides of the room?"

"…"

"…"

"…can I ask you a favor?"

"?"

"…"

Tears started to well in her eyes and with his keen eyesight; he could very much see it despite the unlit room.

Loki stepped closer to the girl, raising a thumb to brush the warlock's cheeks.

"You are utterly pathetic" **_And so am I…_**

He kissed her, over and over again, the next one more passionate and more feverish that the other. He kissed her as if he would never kiss her again. Which, by the way, doesn't really matter because both minds were blank and blocked.

_I love you, you pathetic woman… why don't you see that? Why do you keep on…?_

The next thing he knew he was ramming his body against her smaller frame. Again.

He felt as if he lost his senses as she gasped for her own climax. Afterwards, the warlock turned to her side, her back on Loki.

"…thank you…."

"…for what?"

"…for being such a good friend in need…"

Can anybody just kill him? Numerous suicidal thoughts ran through his mind at an amazing speed of sixty miles per hour.

It was just amazing how much he changed these past few days.

"…of course, Fenris. I'll always be here." The assassin turned to his side too, facing the same direction his partner was.

There was silence.

She tensed. What would he do? How would he react? Why were they both quiet? Did they forget the right way to talk?

Fenris grew conscious of herself. She was naked, he was naked and for all to know, they were lying on the same bed, sharing the same white blanket. She took a deep breath. What was wrong with her? It's not like it was the first time Loki had her. They've done it more than thrice so why be ashamed now?

As if reading her thoughts, he pulled her nearer and whispered.

"I assure you, there is absolutely no need to be shy about your wonderful figure."

He held her then and he didn't seem like he would ever let her waist slip from her grip.

Fenris sighed a relief. Loki seemed to be more casual about their affair. Maybe she should try to be more comfortable in his company as well. Besides, he's the only available choice she's got since Chaos was….screw Chaos! Loki was there, damn it!

"So…how do you feel about Lydia, Loki? She seem to like you a lot." The female started, hoping that the assassin would take the statement as a sign that she wanted to talk.

Loki took the hint and answered with his eyes closed, "Lydia…is like a younger sister to me, like Iris, but more like Taulin."

"Taulin?"

"Yes, a fellow assassin who was said to 'feel' something for me."

"I see."

"…"

"Why don't you respond?"

"I'm sorry. I didn't know that it needed a reply."

"Oh."

"…"

"You're being quiet again."

"Fenris?"

"Yes, Loki?

"Can we just stop this verbal exchange?" The young man leaned in closer, letting his head rest on the nape of her neck.

It wasn't that Loki disliked talking nor did he dislike Fenris' voice. It was just that, according to his acute senses, dawn was approaching and he of course wanted the warlock to have as much rest as possible before waking up the next morning. Luckily for him, Fenris didn't find a reason to retort so she simply nodded before she decided that it was time to go to Dreamland.

But Loki himself did not have any intention to sleep. He kept his eyes shut as he relished the feel of her skin against his.

If ever there was a moment in which Loki didn't care whether he be destroyed or not, that would be it. He could just die holding her as she slept.

Why? And he searched his vast knowledge for an answer. Because when she is sleeping, she belongs to him. She was his and no one not even the goddess Frigg nor the goddess Freya could change his way of thinking.

So what if Fenris loved Chaos? So what if she's never seen him any more than a mere friend? So bloody what?

He didn't care. Fenris Fenrir was an official property of Loki. At least for a moment.

Silence grew thicker and thicker by the moment as he ran out of thoughts.

And then, he wondered. Which of them was the fool? Was it her who loved someone not knowing that someone else would give p everything for her? Or was it he who loved someone that didn't even notice that he was baring his whole soul to her?

He pondered until his head hurt with too much thinking.

Perhaps both were fools. And he was probably more of the idiot.

She was blind and he knew it. So why did he continue to love her?

Because he chose to be blind too.

owari


End file.
